Friday, February 26, 2016

What is it like for students or adults with challenges?

I have been meaning to write this post for weeks now. It's going to be probably pretty lengthy so this is your warning.

I work in Special Education as a Teacher's Aide in a Cluster classroom. All that means is, I am a part-time Teacher Assistant/Aide that helps teachers and students with behavior and with academics, or learning. I do quite a bit of teaching as well. 

I have been thinking a lot about what it might be like for some of our students with various challenges. I do not have Autism or ADHD. But, I have been watching the students’ behaviors and trying to deduce what they may be thinking or feeling like. 

When I first started work in Special Education about 2 and half years ago in 2014, I did not initially understand some of the reasoning behind certain behaviors. Many students with A.D.D. or A.D.H.D. exhibit similar symptoms. I am not a Psychologist, Therapist or Doctor. This is just what I have seen in many of our students. Students with these conditions may need to do something with their hands in order to better listen to the instructions given. Like build Lego’s, or draw. You may think they are not listening, but their bodies or hands need to be moving in order to learn better. However, this is not always the case. Of course, there are many students who just have a hard time focusing on a given task for a set period of time. They become distracted easily, and lose their train of thought, or their focus. Both of these symptoms need to be taken into consideration when dealing with students with these particular challenges. 

Students on the Autism Spectrum differ greatly. My Mentor my best friend Ms. P says; "Once you've met a student with Autism, you've met a student with Autism." It is very true. There are some similarities between these students though. The number one similarity is that they like to talk at you or to you. It is very hard to carry on a 2-way conversation with someone whom you cannot get a word in edge wise. So, one of the basic skills we try to teach these students are, appropriate social skills. Like how to have a polite conversation with another student or teacher: without just talking non-stop, not allowing the other person to speak. This is one of our challenges daily. 

Many of our students on the Autism Spectrum have extreme differences in mental reasoning, or cognitive learning skills. We have some that are higher functioning, and some that are on level functioning, and a few that are low level functioning. All this means, is they function, or work at different mental levels than most of their peers. They still feel, they have strong emotions, they have friends, they want to go to school and have fun, and they want to be accepted. They may not always act, walk or talk like many mainstream students do, but most of the time they do. 

One think I have noticed with many of our students in our cluster, is that they function better with lower student to teacher ratios. In a traditional classroom you may see up to 30 students in a Middle School or Junior High for 1 Teacher. In cluster classes, you see one main Teacher and up to 6 Assistant Teacher's or Teacher Aide's like myself, and sometimes a Cluster Leader who is in charge of the whole group of cluster students in the school, and acts a lot like the Clusters' Principal.  You will see smaller class sizes and more teachers. This is because, that is how the students learn best. 

Most of what I help do is teach and reinforce appropriate social skills between fellow students, and between students and teachers. There is quite a bit of behavior intervention and de-escalating students in my position every day. When I first started out a few years ago, it was a little intense.  It got me a little worried. Now, that I have gotten a little more use to it- I hopefully handle escalations of students with a calm and collected demeanor. I think that I do. 

I happen to have Bi-Polar Disorder also known as Manic Depression and I also happen to have Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Many who work with me, do not know that I have O.D.D. As a child I struggled quite a bit with it, because positions of authority threatened my own individuality and what I wanted to do. So, I often disagreed with them, because I wanted to make my own choice- not because I actually disagreed with the positions of authority. O.D.D. Students are all very different. For me, it was like I wanted to be in charge of myself all the time and I'd fight some of the positions of authority verbally, when I was younger, to try to let them make my own choices. I hardly ever got sent to the Principal's office ever in my youth though. Maybe once in 4th Grade for drawing on a cement bench with a crayon. I had to clean it up. 

I think more than anything I disagreed with my Mom, who was the authority figure at my home and I fought her verbally most of the time, and not my Teachers. She tried homeschooling, but because she was my Mom and she seemed just bossy and mean to me and I fought her that was a pretty hard year. I think it was like 3rd Grade or something. She moved me all around during elementary school. I can't even count how many schools I went to. I had no idea why. 

Anyways, with our students some of them also have O.D.D. and want to be in charge of themselves. Being someone who struggled with that in my youth, I can sort of get a sense of what they are going through. They seem to hate being bossed around. They are very defiant and often have sharp and witty comebacks in their belligerence. They want to choose what they do, and not be told what to do. They don't want to be bossed around, or guided into doing anything. Although, as amazingly as I've found out these types of students make great: Tutors, Teachers, Mentors and Leaders. At least I hope I do, now that I have learned how to deal with my condition and taught myself how to act appropriately in social situations.  

When these students get older, if they can find their voice and channel their defiance into some sort of art form, or something they love doing, they can be amazing leaders. I love to; Sing, Write, Read, Act and Teach. I use these outlets as cathartic treatments for my challenges. I don't call them disabilities, because I am able to do things that everyone else can do, and sometimes more. Students, Teachers, and all People with challenges or diagnosed disorders are not their disorders or conditions! They may have a certain condition. But, it has nothing to do with who they are and what they can do. Attitude determines Altitude!

Thanks for Reading!

Chelsea Merkley

Saturday, June 27, 2015

How I feel about Recent Events Regarding Marriage

An Asian Traditional Marriage
jpg obtained from wikipedia

I believe that God wants marriage to be between a Man and a Woman and God. However, I understand that many others do not agree with me, and I do not have a problem with them living how they choose, as long as they are honest and happy in their relationships and true to one another. And kind to others regarding their choices and know that others have differing opinions and values.

And do not try to force others to do things they don't agree with like a pastor to perform a marriage between gays that doesn't agree religiously to do so. I believe the Pastor, Church has a right to decline on the basis of conflicting beliefs. I Can believe that God has commanded for marriage to be between a man and a woman. And each person has the right to believe snd worship; how, where, or what they may. According to the dictates of their own consciences. I know others makes different decisions than I do. I do not condone their acts, and I do not agree with them. However, this does not mean I treat any of these people differently. I try to show kindness and love to them.

I affirm that I believe marriage to be a union instituted by God between a Man And A Woman. However, that does not mean that I treat LGBTQ or Gays or Lesbians differently than I treat my fellow Men and Women in this World. I try to treat them with kindness and love.

They do not want my religion, values or philosophy on life instituted upon them. I do not want theirs instituted upon me. We have differing opinions and choices. That does not mean we cannot be kind, and loving. We are all a part of the human race. Our biggest need in this life is to be loved, accepted, to have meaningful and poignant relationships. I affirm that every person living today needs this and has the right to seek their own happiness. Even if it differs from mine.

Part of my soul feels that even if others disagree with me on values, morals and the way they live their lives; that I should still be compassionate, kind, understanding and human in my response. I'd like to think that my best, I am a very empathetic, for almost every person I have ever met. Of course, there are certain exceptions, but, I want to respond to this ruling as a Christian. How would a Christian person respond? With love, compassion, understanding and empathy. Regardless of Religion, whether profess to be; Christian, Atheist, Hasidic Jew, Hindu, Islam, Episcapalian, Catholic or anything else- I think we can all respond in a similar way. With love and understanding. We might not understand completely what each LGBTQ situation is or how they feel, but we can try. And we can show kindness. Let them be who they choose to be, and make their own decisions.

My views may be somewhat progressive for many in my faith. Actually, they might not be. I was raised in an Ultra-Conservative Republican home. That home was shattered when my parents had a very bad split up, divorce, (gasp), I felt somewhat ostracized and so did both of my parents to some extent. This gave me so much empathy for many in differing and similar situations. Or, who may have had to live with abusers. Regardless of gender, creed in a marriage or any relationship; no one should have to live with an abuser.  Or a broken home. That was healing, coming to that realization.

Persons who identify themselves as LGBTQ are not that different from you and I. They are people trying to live life the way that feels right to them, regardless of what I think. I can remember that we have more in common than we have different. I might not agree with the way they choose to live, but I can respect it. Just as they respect my heterosexual marriage and union, I can respect their need to have rights that are similar to mine. Maybe I am Libertarian, I had always thought I was a Republican. Personally, I don't think my Political Affiliation really matters at all.

I know that people have a right to make choices that makes them happy. I make choices every day that I think are the best for me and my family. Those in LGBTQ Families are making choices every day that are just a little different from mine. I still believe marriage is between a Man and a Woman and God. I know this. However, this does not mean that others do not have the right to believe otherwise. In 2 of the articles of faith I believe in it states what I am thinking very well. Articles of faith 11 and 12.

11 We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may.
 12 We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law.
I also believe that Gender is a Divine Charachteristic.  I believe in the Family a Proclamation to the World as well.  I can believe in all these things at the same time. I want the world to be happy. And the inhabitants to be happy. Satan's plan was to not allow us to choose for ourselves, that we would all be made to come back to God in the end, but we had no choice. Heavenly Father and Jesus want us to choose them, not be coerced, or be forced to live among them above. Our decisions and our actions, our will was given to us from God. I feel that each person on the earth has a right to choose what they will do with their life. 



WE, THE FIRST PRESIDENCY and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.
ALL HUMAN BEINGS—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose.
IN THE PREMORTAL REALM, spirit sons and daughters knew and worshipped God as their Eternal Father and accepted His plan by which His children could obtain a physical body and gain earthly experience to progress toward perfection and ultimately realize their divine destiny as heirs of eternal life. The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally.
THE FIRST COMMANDMENT that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.
WE DECLARE the means by which mortal life is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its importance in God’s eternal plan.
HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.
THE FAMILY is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.
WE WARN that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.
WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society

The Proclamation was put forth By the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints I have used its contents, but the Church owns the work, prayers and revalation that this document came from and everything it is.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Love That Lasts

I found a beautiful new book called; "Love That Lasts" By the Lundburg Couple- Joy and Gary.  I have really enjoyed it thus far.

Here is a list they cite in their book, about ways to reconnect with your spouse. They are mainly questions which can be gone over together, and answered by each party, without interruption or correction from the other. The goal is to spark deep, meaningful conversation that is peaceful and happy, and find new ways to have fun together. To contemplate on what about your spouse makes you content, and what things you are thankful for regarding past experiences you've had with your spouse.

I was also thinking that some fun Couple Games could be played with this list. Like putting the questions in a hat or a jar and picking one, and answering it about your spouse and vice versa.

1.Where did you first see each other?  How did you get introduced?

2.  When you first met what attracted you to your spouse?.

3.  What caused you to ask for the first date?

4. What feelings did you have when you first kissed?

5. What were the most endearing acts or words that made you realize that this relationship was intended to be a lasting one?

6. What Physical Features do you love most about your spouse?

7. Which of your spouse’s charachteristics brings you the greatest feeling of security or comfort?

8. What charachteristic has his or her  brought from their childhood family to your  home, for which you are grateful?

9.  What is at least one area of knowledge or expertise which has been improved by your association with your spouse?

10. When was a time, when you felt especially close to your spouse?

11. What were your most fun and memorable dates during courtship?

12. What activities would you enjoy doing now for a fun date?

13. If you could have a day alone together, how would you want to spend it?

14.What could you do to make your next Anniversary Celebration fun and memorable?

What Does Your Spouse Like?

1.     Food, Main Dish(es)?   
2.     Meal?    
3.     Dessert?
4.     Beverage?
5.     Candy?

Category: Movies

Favorite Type of Movies

Favorite Actor/Actress(es)


What Type of Music?

What Song is their Favorite?

What Singer or Band is their Favorite?

Category: Sports




Category: Relaxation








Listening to Music?


Favorite TV Show(s)

Favorite Category of Books

Favorite Books or Series

Favorite Writers or Authors

Hobbies and Interests

What does your spouse love to do?

Favorite Car?

Favorite Flower(s)?

Favorite Color(s)?

Friday, November 7, 2014


Well, October is over and it's coming up on November 8! I will admit, I am pretty good at posting family photos on certain social media outlets, but, I have been craving and yearning to write for quite a while now. My spouse works 30-40 hour weeks and I stay home with our child. My Spouse also goes to night school, one night a week- and I find that while he has our computer, I feel like i get withdrawals from writing and blogging. This has led me to think that there is quite a bit I could do from home while watching my child, teaching him, and helping him with school work and home work. I need to find a balance of family, work and play. And I hope to find it very soon. I've not always been a stay at home Mom. And, to those of you who know me, if you know Homemakers- we don't stay home all day every day. While my son was out of school for the past 2 weeks I took him on lots of outdoor Adventures, so we can learn while it is still warm enough to go outside, and still have fun.

My son in July 2014

I have been realizing lately, how much I love to learn. I am a Lifelong Learner. I enjoy school very much and plan to get a Master's someday, when it is more convenient for our family. I would like to become a Teacher both in Elementary and Middle Schools; and maybe someday Higher Education. I deeply enjoy Education.

I taught middle school last year as a Teacher's Aide. That is where I found out how challenging, and how rewarding Education can be. I was a Teacher's Aide at a Local Middle School where I helped a Special Education Teacher and her Students. These Students were all over the map both; cognitively and behaviorally. I loved working with them, and helping them learn, and letting them know how their safety is our priority in Education. I won't say that everything went smoothly, because no class ever does, but- there was so much I learned from every single experience and event that happened in that classroom. I used to work in Daycares years ago, and I can tell you from my experience as a Caregiver, who's worked in several Daycare Centers and worked in Schools- a place where Education and safety of the child is the Primary Focus is so much better for most children.

As a Mother, I can tell you that the kind of ratios you have with your children, a 1 on 1 learning environment or a 2 on 1 learning environment- are most likely, not going to happen in a Daycare Setting, and probably not in an Education Setting either. Homeschooling is a wonderful choice to be available for every family, it is not for every family though.

 My child is currently in a Public School System. I work with him at home to help him reinforce and retain what he is learning at school. We do Math Bingo, Spanish Bingo, Word Bingo, Sight Words, I let him choose books at the library he loves and he reads them to me. We also encourage him to read from the Holy Bible and other Holy Scriptures Daily. It helps a lot. He is now into SpongeBob Square Pants Books, and Fly Guy Books. He reads signs when we are driving in the car, and not just the road signs, but restaurant signs, advertisements, and anything he wants to read that he sees. I let him help me cook and he eats a little better when I let him help me make the meal, some of the time. 

In the mean time, I hope to find something that will help our Family and its financial needs, and not a selling make-up scam, or toys or hair accessories or books, or online writing for sites which don't pay. Chelsea

Monday, October 6, 2014

Notes from LDS General Conference

Just as a preface for the Reader's Information, some of these writings are direct quotes from LDS General Conference. Some of them are not. Many of my thoughts and feelings are also intertwined with what was said by Our Church Leaders. While there may be some lines and pages which were written as what was said in Conference, I cannot guarantee, that the quotes are all the same as what was spoken; or not mixed with my thoughts, impressions, or feelings on the subjects being spoken about. Keep in mind that my written feelings may be different, and in a completely different context with what was spoken about this last weekend. That being said, I hope that my notes help you and I to ponder about what we were taught recently.

President Monson

In the Spirit world we decided to come to mortality, the primary purposes to obtain a body of flesh and bones, to see if we would keep the commandments. And we will prove them herewith to see if they will do all things the lord shall command them.

We brought with us our agency from Heaven. We are privileged to choose for ourselves. We differentiate good and evil learn that decisions determine destiny.
God sent us here with direction and guidance and the tools we need, as we seek his help and strive to do all we can to gain eternal life. We have the words of God to help guide us. We have the counsel and teachings of God Prophets. The example of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Come follow me, works which ye hath seen me do, that shall ye be also. Jesus marked the way and the path. We look to Jesus as our Savior and Exemplar. As we follow in his footsteps we can gain entrance to heaven to live with him forever.

Walking  where Jesus walked is less important than walking AS Jesus walked.  All of us can walk the path he walked with his words ringing in our ears, his spirit filling our hearts and his teachings guiding our path. I am the way the truth and the Life. 

The path Jesus walked took him through paths of disappointment, his lament over Jerusalem. The children of Israel had rejected the wing of his guidance. He feels deep sorrow and anguish. 

Jesus walked the path of temptation from Lucifer, the devil. The devil tempted him fasted 40 days and 40 nights, he resisted each temptation. Get thee hence Satan.

Jesus walked the path of pain. None could forget his suffering on the cruel cross and the Garden of Gethsemane.

The Devil should tempt the children of men, or they could not be agents unto themselves. We learn in mortality great pain and suffering and sorrow, but we can also find great happiness.

We with Jesus can walk the path of obedience. To obey is better than to sacrifice.

It will not always be easy.
Jesus brought strength to the crippled. Sight to the blind.

His prayer in Gethsemane; not my will but thine be done. Read and Study the Holy Scriptures; be merciful, humble, prayerful, and righteous in heart. God asks us to let our lights shine so that others may desire to know our father in heaven.

 Christ teaches us to be morally clean in both our thoughts and our actions. His parables teach with power and authority. Teaches us to love our neighbors. Go to the rescue of those who have left the path and lost the way. Strive to follow Christ by following his teachings and walk the path he walked. Do his work as his disciples, no other choice we can make, can make us what he can.

To see and share some General Conference Quotes with Uplifting Pictures go here;

To watch LDS General Conference, Or Listen go here;

L Tom Perry

Life has good & bad
Gospel sure foundation
Knowledge of the lord's eternal plan
We follow the Savior

Come unto me and i will give you rest
My peace i give unto you
You shall receive power
You shall rejoice

Look to Jesus and live and find lasting peace
We fix our eyes on Christ truly and currently is the Savior and Redeemer of the world

Wheat & Tares
Where did the tares come from? An enemy
The Tares and Wheat Grow together
Gather the tares and burn them
Then reap the wheat

Tares Wicked and worldly ways
Through the air, the devices for education
The tares will have no appeal to the eye of the ear
Enter in by the way and receive the holy ghost it will tell you all things that we should do.

Disintegration of the family bring only sorrow and sadness
Deterioration of family values
Prophets have forewarned
Our homes must be holy places
Greatest blessings come to righteous families and parents
Most powerful teaching come from righteous fathers and mothers

The influence she has on her children
We cannot begin to measure of a woman who builds stable family life for generations of the future. Do all they can to strengthen the home.

Fathers- Give blessings
Build Family Traditions &
Teach children gospel principles
The value of work
Set examples of work
Fathers is their most sacred calling

Which is more important?
Prayers or fruit

Spirit of Sacrifice
Ever Stronger Reliance on the teachings of the Lord and Savior

We need righteous parents
Gospel of Jesus Christ is a sure foundation building eternal family units

Richard G Scott
1. Prayer
Make time every day to share your thoughts and feelings with him
Father in heaven will never force you to pray
Your heart will begin to feel peace when you pray fervently

Parents Safeguard your children by arming them morning and night with family prayer 
Family prayer should be a non negotiable part of every day life

2. Study the scriptures daily with your children
Choose to take time to read your scriptures
You need to study in the scriptures with your family

3. Weekly Family Home Evening
One night a week
As a Family
The time invested the Gospel should be taught formally & informally in a safe environment to strengthen family bonds- to talk to each other to strengthen your relationships.
4. Go to the Temple
No more peaceful place in this earth than in the Lord's Temple
Don't let anyone or anything prevent you from being there
Pray and listen to the spirit there
Providing your own family names in the temple

Peace comes from his atoning sacrifice

Sister Carol FMcConkie

Prophets are messengers of Christ
Authorize the performance of saving ordinances
Our prophet reveals the word of the lord 
The lord commands us; His word shalt thou receive as it is from the Lord's Mouth.

Church Leaders;
Speak & Prophecy of the Word of the Lord
The Lord has spoken whether by my own voice or by the voice of my servants, it is the same. God reveals his work through his servants.

When we choose to live on the covenant path we are happier. 

Russell M Nelson

Sustain A Prophet

It is an important duty to do so not only, by the lifting of the hand but in deed and in truth.

Elder Kimball was operated on by Elder Nelson
By God's Will ( not only the Doctors hands) were able to heal and protect President Kimball who only a few months after the surgery became President of the Church.
The restoration shattered the age old myth that God has stopped talking to his children.

Sustaining Prophets and other leaders 
Invoke the law of common consent that the someone has the correct authority
Gives us confidence and faith

All leaders in the Lord's Church are called by the Proper Authority
No prophet has ever been elected
No prophet has ever chosen himself

Man's ways remove people from office when they are old or get sick. God's ways are not, and will never be man's ways.

We will do our utmost to do what they ( our Prophet and prophets, seers and revelators) say and teach.

The obligation that we make when we raise our hands is a most sacred one, it means that we will stand behind him, we will pray for him and defend his name and strive to carry out his instructions. 

Sustaining the Prophet & prophets, seers and revalators. Decisions of these leaders must be unanimous. These 15 men know what the will of the Lord is when unanimity is reached. Thy will be done on earth as it in heaven. 

The church has been organized by the Lord himself. He has put in place redundancy and back up. Counter balances & safe guards abound so that no one man can ever lead the church astray. 

Jeffrey R. Holland

Jesus was homeless
For much of his adult life
The Physical effects of Homelessness we see clearly
The Spiritual and emotional damage of homelessness do untold damage

Jehovah would judge the house harshly
The spoil of the needy is in your faces
Look to the poor and needy that they shall not suffer

Her work was about love not statistics
Serving those within her reach
Cease withholding our means because we think they have caused their own homelessness

We all cry to God who compassionately responds to us
We should compassionately impart of our substance to those who stand in need. We are to do what we can when others are in need.

My reverence for thrift, self reliance and is as strong as any man's. God will help you in compassionate discipleship. Constantly look for ways to keep commandments.

We should pray for those in need.


Live the Law of the Fast
Fast for healing

Henry B Eyering

My hope is that we may all feel love and light.
Blessings of personal revelation
Stake presidents & bishops praying to try to find and help lost sheep
Revalation from God
We need a Constantly renewed stream
Continuing Blessing of Communication with God

Joseph asked of God & was given an answer
Revelation from God could be continuous
Revelation continues in the Church
The Individual for himself
The Father for his Family

Nephi's family viewed Lehi's dream as mental confusion
Nephi- I will go and do the things which the Lord has commanded me. Nephi had been blessed with confirming revelation that his Father's revelation was true.

The Revelation of a Parent has a lasting effect of confirming revelation to the child.

She prays that her words will come for the blessing of her child, that her words will be God's words.

I hope that I Go and do as she hoped I would. His Mother has been in the spirit world for more than 4 years.

Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly. The Holy Ghost will be your constant companion. The Gift of confirming revelation from the Holy Ghost. The holy ghost can touch a softened heart.